once there was a quiet man who lived the the big city. as the story goes, he did not live there long, because he found the city to be very noisy, stressful and lacking in deep spiritual value. thus, the quiet man moved away from the city to the dark forest.

     in the dark forest he built himself a small hut out of sticks he found amongst the fallen leaves. he used tree sap and stray vines and to hold the hut together, and it served him very well. the quiet man lived in the forest for many years, beneath the hushed wind of the pines. so many years, in fact, that the people of the city forgot all about the quiet man.

     it happened one day that Goddess was painting Her toenails when she looked down upon the earth and saw the dark forest. within the dark forest, She saw the quiet man and his hut made of sticks. as Her toenails dried in the solar wind, She watched the quiet man as he spent his day walking amongst the pines in joyful solitude. it became clear to Goddess that this man, the quiet man, had transcended the dreary, numbing world of his fellow men and had reached a state of true peace. for this reason, She decided to reward the man in a simple way.

     the next day, Goddess came down to visit the man, after curling Her hair and applying Her favorite mascara. She knocked upon the door of his hut made of sticks, and the quiet man answered. upon seeing Goddess, the quiet man was awestruck and a beaming smile rose upon his face. "you have chosen a good life, quiet man. here...", She said, and handed the quiet man a McDonald's gift certificate. the man took the gift certificate, wrinked his brow, and replied, "but, there is no fast food in the dark forest." "yes", Goddess said, and departed.

     the quiet man began to laugh. he laughed for three minutes, and then laughed for another ten. when another seven minutes had passed, the quiet man was still laughing. he laughed for a long while that day, until he passed out in a heap amongst the fallen leaves. when night fell, the cold winds swept through the dark forest and the man died of hypothermia.

     it may be said that the quiet man will always die laughing at the expense of foolish societal structures. it is more likely, however, that Goddess just needs to get Herself a life.